by Lucinda Staniland I've been using the word 'ambivalent' a lot recently. I like the sound of it. I like that it acknowledges complexity - of myself and of the world. I like that it doesn't lock me, or anyone else, into a box. Take getting married for example. My partner and I were married in January 2017, and for me, it was a classic experience of ambivalence. In fact, it was during the preparations for our wedding that the word 'ambivalent' became a core part of my vocabulary. I … [Read more...]
What Does it Mean to Love Unconditionally?
by Kara-Leah Grant Recently in our Heart of Tribe Facebook Group, one of the participants asked me to elaborate on what it means to love people - especially family - unconditionally. “For me, to do this fully would at times be to my own detriment. Sometimes it's just too much 'stuff', too much drama. What do we do when we can't hold that space for them? Or worse...when their stuff is just toxic. And how to discern when to do this and when you just...can't/shouldn’t.” That first … [Read more...]
Grief: The Shadow Side of the Heart Chakra
by Kara-Leah Grant It's all good and well to do these wonderful heart-opening or heart-balancing yoga practices, but without a proper understanding of all aspects of the heart chakra, we can easily hit a wall of resistance that stops our practice cold. The heart chakra is about our ability to love - which requires that we open to the possibility of grief, sorrow and disappointment as well as the wonderful sensations of love, joy, fulfilment and compassion. Working with this kriya meant I was … [Read more...]
How to Consciously Face into Relationship Issues with Love
by Kara-Leah Grant, Musings from the Mat I'm shaken to write this article barely three weeks after exploring the concept of loving without attachment. In that article, I faced squarely into the possibility of losing my man in order to let go of the fear and attachment I had around our love. And yesterday morning, my man packed his bags and left. Not because he doesn't love me deeply - he does - but because he can't take on my son as well. Stepping into a parenting situation with a … [Read more...]
Confessions of an ex-relationship manipulator and control freak
by Kara-Leah Grant, Musings from the Mat Ok, the headline is harsh. I admit it. But also true. See, over the last while, I've been working with a relationship pattern (a samskara) of giving away my power by not speaking my truth because I was afraid of the consequences. It's an insidious pattern because it has all kinds of detrimental effects on one's self-esteem, and the relationships one is in. Plus it creates suffering as the desire to hold on to something while betraying oneself can … [Read more...]
Looking for the man of your dreams? … Don’t!
I’ve found the man of my awakeness by guest author Alys Titchener My flatmate Kara-Leah and I were sitting on our lounge floor one afternoon doing some stretches before dinner. I was deep in thought and before I could censor myself, I blurted out; I feel like I’ve found the man of my awakeness. I wasn’t quite sure what I meant by that, only that this statement arose because what I was experiencing was… not so familiar. What has become familiar about those times I’ve fallen in love with the man … [Read more...]
Breaking away from asana and exploring the other limbs of yoga
We have just moved house, my partner and I. In the midst of trying to insure we have all our things in spaces that make sense, I’ve been eyeing the large deck and huge lounge floor. This house is made for practicing Yoga. Which I haven’t done in I don’t know how long. Not specifically the sort that everyone thinks of when they hear the word ‘yoga’, anyway. That is to say: my life has had no asana practice for a couple weeks. Since asana is only one of eight – 1 of 8! – limbs of Yoga, … [Read more...]
How I Finally Kicked my Co-dependent Relationship to the Kerb
by Kara-Leah Grant, Musings from the Mat Who'd've thought? Strong, independent, courageous Moi was stuck in a co-dependent relationship. Yep, me neither. Despite getting wind of this fact about halfway through our 3 year or so relationship, it took me another 18 months to break the pattern. Which in the end meant breaking off the relationship. This relationship had been increasingly volatile ever since I got back from Prana Flow yoga teacher training in LA. I'd made a commitment to … [Read more...]
How yoga helped me… stand tall, both literally and emotionally
This is an on-going series of yoga stories submitted by Yoga Lunchbox readers. Tell us how yoga changed your lift here. By Anonymous I’ve been a sporty type for 10 years or so now I go through phases of running, biking, and weight training. Over the last 5 years I’ve found yoga and since then it has typically part been part of my weekly routine. I’m prone to very bad posture and yoga has taught me to be aware of my body. More specifically, it has helped me become aware of how nice … [Read more...]
Everything is stable… until it’s not
by guest author Katie Lane What the Christchurch earthquake is teaching me about stability. Just when I thought I’d found my roots...the ground shook. AGAIN. Tuesday morning, 11.32am. The biggest aftershock I felt since our original 7.1 magnitude earthquake in early September. Compared to the BIG event, this shake was minor. However, a 5.0 on any scale is really no small thing! The woman I was talking with on the phone started to cry and hung up the apologizing that she needed to call her … [Read more...]