by Kara-Leah Grant, Musings from the Mat
I’m experiencing my ideal life right now.
It’s a simple life – living in a town four square blocks large, living with my mother. Everything is a walk away – the post office, the lake, the shop, the cafe, the playground and childcare.
It’s ideal for a single mother determined to become financially independent. It means I can focus on being the best mother possible, and I can focus on building my business.
It means that I’m enjoying my son more than ever, and I’m more productive and creative than ever before.
Sure, I miss my friends and the social life of a bigger town or city, and I would love to have someone to share my life with… but this simplicity and purity means I can focus on what’s important right now. My son. My work. And our future.
My intuition that a simple life would fed my creativity and help me find clarity and stillness has proved true.
Four days a week, my son is in care for six hours.
In those six hours, I write for two hours, handle business and paid work for two hours, meditate or practice yoga for up to an hour, and finish off with another hour of writing.
On the other three days, I squeeze in up to an hour of writing while Samuel sleeps, or at night. I practice yoga and meditate when he plays around me.
Right now, he’s sleeping, I’ve got the dance tunes cranked, and I’m making soup, cleaning kitchen and folding washing. I enjoy it all – I love the cooking, I love the cleaning, I love taking care of him, I love taking care of the house.
Yes, this is my perfect life – which is why I’ve been silent recently. Not much to say when all is well. Oh there’s still things I’m working through, understandings I’m coming to, insights I’m having… but nothing to write home about.
There’s been realisations that I’ve been afraid to do what I want, because if I dare declare that This is What I Want, then someone could take it away from me.
There’s plenty of learnings from living with my Mum – getting to observe her in action, watch when I get annoyed, and learn something about myself. Plus watch her go through the same process.
And there’s a sense of settling into my own skin and realising that I’ve known me all along, that it’s only ever been my own fears getting in the way, that all I’ve ever needed to do was turn and face myself.
There is a great sense of power that comes with this. A sense that, I can handle whatever comes my way. I can do this. A sense of… I can.
And so can you. Most of you probably already are – just getting on and going about your lives, being you, with no great song and dance because it’s not a big deal.
It has been a big deal for me though. Not sure why, and tell the truth, don’t really care to dive into why right now. Likely it doesn’t even matter.
Suffice to say I am here.
I am writing.
I am meditating.
I am living.
And I am loving, all of it.
(Oh, that writing I’m doing every day? A book. About creating and sticking to your own home practice. First draft done. Some 35,000 words. Revising right now. Expect something in December. After all, I declared we were going to publish a book… and we are.)