Image by Christian Northe from Pixabay
by guest author Alys Titchener
It took me years to turn up to a yoga class.
Years and years of liking the idea of yoga before actually appearing on a yoga mat.
Why?
Whenever I confessed I’d never done a yoga class; I’d always append the confession with – I’m not flexible enough.
Never have been.
I got dropped from the gymnastics club at the age of eight because I couldn’t reach my toes. I could do handstands, I could vault, I could balance on the beam, but I couldn’t touch my toes.
Perhaps there was a trajectory right there; I threw myself into running and cycling and other ‘flexibility not required’ activities. I withdrew from stretching because of the awkward shape my body took when reaching for those ten toes, and I most certainly did not dance the limbo – how low can you go!
My body was tight, and I reasoned, yoga just wasn’t meant for me.
I appreciate ‘reasoned’ is probably an illogical choice of word, but it turns out this ‘reason’ is pretty pervasive in yoga-ain’t-for-me circles.
And a very common response to such an excuse goes something along the lines of this:
That’s like saying that you can’t go grocery shopping because you don’t have anything in your cupboards. Or your teeth are too dirty to brush.
Flexibility is a product of yoga, not a prerequisite.
The illogical nature of this excuse is worth exploring, because I’m sure others, like me, don’t intend on being illogical.
It’s more likely that we know, without a doubt, we’re not going to measure up to the body ideals that yoga throws in our path.
I appreciate this may be my bag here, but I have genuine admiration for a plump body that displays ease and softness. This still fits into my yoga-ideal.
But when I see a stiff body, gangly or otherwise, trying so hard to stretch into something that body isn’t capable of doing, I feel… sorry for them.
And me.
I ask myself; do we fit in to the yoga scene?
Alienating myself from a practice that I know will give me so many benefits started to make sense when I read a post by Marianne Elliot last year on her blog. She writes about body shame.
…for most of the women I know and most of the people who come to my classes, I’m aware that yoga can all too easily become simply another place in which to beat ourselves up about the inadequacies of our bodies
Of course, I didn’t know that when I was actively avoiding yoga, but, simply put, I was avoiding another way of shaming myself.
Turning up to a yoga class, scared stiff
Even though I was steering clear of yoga, my circle of friends got thicker and thicker with yogis and yoginis. Some part of me was drawn to the counter-culture yogic lifestyle, but, sadly, I lacked the flexible body-type I thought I needed to participate in it.
One day a friend in a similar space to me suggested we support each other in our first ever yoga class. Knowing that I’d have at least one ally, I agreed to the class.
We stood at the back and followed along as best we could.
Now I was a reasonably fit person at that point, but this class busted me. Even in the warm ups of bending forward to release our back and then hang there, my thighs screamed out. I could see other students flopping into this posture while I had to hold the position. There was no suppleness in my back, my thighs were tight and my calf muscles were crying.
I was working way harder than everyone else. I was running a marathon. These guys were … sunbathing!
My friend and I didn’t go back. We’d been fairly light-hearted throughout the class, getting giggles as we struggled through even more ridiculous postures. But enjoyable at a body level? Nope; that wasn’t our experience. Not only did I feel I lacked the flexibility for yoga, I now believed I lacked the strength and fitness as well.
I had periodic skirmishes with the yoga mat over the next few years but there was no juice to my commitment. More often than not, I talked myself out of attending a class. I simply didn’t enjoy how much my body hurt as I held a posture, nor ravished the idea of being next to an amazing example of flexibility.
And all the while I KNEW that if I kept turning up to yoga classes, I could become one of those flexible bodies. I wondered, why couldn’t I commit to a practice that would give me the body I wanted?
Because if I’m honest with that question, creating the body I want has never been a good enough motivation for me.
I needed a motivation that was more aligned with my lifestyle and values.
Oh for many reasons; there’s too much striving in that little statement. I felt worn out just picking up the idea, let alone the practice. The goal post was too far away and I felt defeated before I began.
Even today, after several years of practicing yoga regularly, the motivation to ‘create the body I want’ causes such a heavy energy to descend on me that I literally end up crawling off my yoga mat defeated and depressed. Aspiring to a body ideal is the least motivating sentiment I’ve ever encountered, and one that, personally, I can’t work with.
Finding my motivation to practice yoga
My motivation to practice yoga arrived in due course. I’d just completed my first ever silent retreat with the meditation group Art of Living. I’d sat on the floor for the five days of meditation and satsang, and by the end, I was neck, shoulders, spine, hips, butt, knees and ankles, full body s-o-r-e!
In love with meditation, yet not in love with my body.
For the sake of alleviating the physical discomfort while meditating I would commit to practicing yoga.
At about that time, a gentle yoga class started up at my work that had a playful approach to postures, sometimes crawling around on the floor like a toddler, holding our feet like an infant, breathing slowly with matching limb articulations and so on.
It didn’t really feel like ‘real yoga’ to me – I wasn’t working hard and we didn’t often do any classical looking asanas either. I kept on coming back to the class though; something soft was coming through and it made me feel good.
These quirky classes of a half dozen or so colleagues helped me to get over myself and the ideas I had about what yoga ought to look like, and more importantly, what I thought I ought to look like doing yoga.
That admission alone changed my attitude to yoga. I started enjoying it. I started enjoying me doing yoga.
I wanted to commit to a yoga practice that would give me ease.
With growing confidence, I let myself experience a real yoga studio. I went to yoga classes that encouraged me to pay attention particularly to alignment and to keeping integrity within the confines of my body.
I began taking pride in not pushing myself into ridiculous stretches despite the deep stretch of the person next to me. And I began to foster a dialogue between myself and my breath that would become my cue to self-adjust in my own personal practice.
In essence, I became curious.
Given my still limited range of movement when opening in to a posture, I was quite naturally drawn to the subtleties of the practice. Finding adjustments to suit my body became my thing. Feeling light and buoyant became the ‘stretch’.
I entered into an exploration of my body and the practice. I questioned what was happening when I felt heavy and burdened; was I actually holding when I could in fact be relaxing into that space?
This question was important because as a self-identified stiff-bodied person, I’d forgotten that my body was capable of finding a bit more space for exploration. One day I spontaneously relaxed in down-ward facing dog, and my heels literally dropped a centimeter or two towards the floor. I almost yelped in surprise.
I couldn’t help but feel the joy of those tiny signs – my body was learning to soften.
Learning the essence of yoga.
I remember, after a monumental heartbreak one day, I turned up to a yoga class determined not to torture my experience with my grief-laden mind. For that whole practice – given the wild chop of emotions off the mat – I gave every ounce of my attention to being on the mat. To being totally present to that practice.
And I did it. Every time my attention slipped off the mat, I could feel the crashing grief right at my doorstep. This became a useful gate-keeper to pulling my attention back on to the mat.
While I don’t advocate resisting emotions in that way, it sure was a useful first step in experiencing the domain of mind and suffering versus being present and finding peace.
These conscious moments are what keep me coming back to yoga.
In the course of my practice, I often experience an aligned mind. A buoyant mind. A light mind. A soft mind. An easy mind. And yes, a flexible mind.
For myself, I needed to find the motivation that could steer me past my body issues in order to give yoga a fair chance.
Focusing on perfecting the body amplified my lack of worthiness.
Focusing on enjoying my experience by quieting my mind provided a natural incentive for me to turn up to class again, and again, and keep going.
A wise teacher once said:
‘Its not about touching your toes, but about what you learn about yourself on the way down’.
I agree!
Thanks Alys, for this openhearted exploration.
‘Its not about touching your toes, but about what you learn about yourself on the way down’.
So true, I hope I give that message to my students. And funny enough that message only really started to dawn on me after a 10-day silent Vipassana retreat.
In fact, I think not-so-flexible people might just have an advantage when it comes to quieting the mind. They get to practice sooner. Whereas the flexible ones need to put themselves in a double pretzel before having to deal with mental discomfort.
Thanks Merel. Yeah I can imagine a 10 day vipassana retreat might whip the ease out of even the most flexible body… thou I’m curious… does a still body beget a still mind? Thanks for sharing. xx
Hi my name is Lisa and I’m as stiff as they come. I came into yoga for a different form of exercise to help with my stiffness and increase my flexibility. I struggle with many of the poses as well and get frustrated and scared of going to classes because of how I feel about myself and the way I look in my practice. I was horrible at gymnastics but excellent at swimming and weight training. I’ve practiced Karate for six years and received my black belt but was still never the most flexible or coordinated. I would of course like to improve my flexability to assist with my practice because I love the way I feel when I complete a yoga workout…. Free, light, relaxed, centered which is excellent for high energy personality plus it helps me sleep like a baby and shuts my brain off. I haven’t lost a lot of weight yet but I’m not ready to give up. So what do you think should I attend a class or keep going in my own? All the support in this would be wonderful, thanks fellow yogis!!! Namaste
Hey Lisa,
It’s all about finding the right class & the right teacher – a real yoga teacher, not just a yoga instructor. You need someone who can see you, and your body, and your mind, and speak directly to what you need, giving you the kind of support you need. I would try as many classes and teachers as it takes to find the right one. This is such an important thing! I’ve even devoted a couple of chapters to it in my book The No-More-Excuses Guide to Yoga because finding the right teacher can mean the difference between sticking with yoga, or giving it up.
Good luck!
KL
Oh My goodness – did I write that in some weird future parallel Universe? I have always been a gangly but stiff and inflexible type. Now Im 50, I’m a bit heavier but still stiff and inflexible and it was getting worse. But i’m finally old enough to not care – but what helps me really not care, is Jude Mahood in Dunedin.
I have been attending her classes for about 6 weeks now. I hate to miss!! She is just so polite but encouraging about my inflexibility and uses terms like “what’s available to you today.” So I’m allowed to be stiff and inflexible but most importantly patient with my body.
And what is most important, is that I’m noticing change already. My shoulder pain is all but gone already. I can turn my neck further to pull out of a parking spot. I can bend to paint my toenails more easily! I’m sold. And… after reading this, who knows I might be teaching yoga in the rest home in 30 years. 🙂
oh I LOVE the idea of you teaching yoga in a rest home in 30 years time. 🙂
I agree that having the right teacher and teaching ethos is the ‘make or break’ to committing to a yoga practice at the start. Glad to hear there are tangible affects for you and your body with your yoga practice. Thanks for sharing!! xx
I am so glad I found this web site.
Contrary to the inflexibility situation of your and previous posters, I am 71 y.o. Male, Fat and I tire easily, but I am able to bend more than other senior citizens.
However, I never could imagine myself going through all those contortions!
However, I WANT TO MAKE THE EFFORT to achieve some healthy level that is safe and beneficial to my body and mind.
I live in Seattle, in the state of Washington, USA.
Would you have any advise as to where you could refer me, in my town, to get medically & sane directions to start yoga.
thank you. Your article motivated me to inquire further.
jean-claude, you’ll probably get much better suggestions from others, but just for the meanwhile, i’d suggest seeing if silversneakers offers classes in your area, they’d have yoga and functional fitness type classes, both would specifically address issues for a senior
my wife and i teach senior and deconditioned adults yoga and fitness classes, and just having an instructor familiar with senior issues would be enough to give you a good class
so i’d also call any of the y’s, and also the big fitness chains, and of course any senior centers
often people who teach at studios etc that teach seniors, also teach at these other locations
finally, strongerseniors.com has a fantastic array of dvd’s, including for yoga; i’ve got reviews of some of the dvds on my site, and of some of what silversneakers offers
if you feel inclined, my posts on teaching (learning from) limitations, and on the good things about getting old(er) might help 😉
but the best thing in your favor, in my opinion, is your desire to be healthier and happier, and in a SAFE manner 😉
best wishes to you, take care,
adan
Hey Adan,
I was going to ask if you could reply to Jean-Claude… but you beat me to it. Thank you for such an informative comment, really appreciate it!
Blessings,
KL
Hey Aly,
I love this article. I too was a totally inflexible yoga student and yoga teacher. I’m still not that bendy as far as yoga teachers go… but man I’ve come a long way.
When I first started yoga I couldn’t even bend forward and touch my KNEES let along my toes! True! I used to have dreams back then of bending forward and being able to SEE my kness… lo and behold, ten years later, I CAN see my knees (and touch my toes) when I bend forward.
Now I have delicious dreams about effortless folding into a compact seated forward bend – melting belly on to thighs, forehead on to shins. Give me another few years, and I’ll be there.
Dream yoga rocks!
Hey KL. I can’t tell you how encouraging that is to hear!!! Yeah, go the dream-yoga!
Hi.
I really would like to learn dream yoga. May I ask where I could learn it in Auckland?
Cheers
Andy
Hey Andy,
I’ve no idea, but have posted a comment on the Yoga Lunchbox facebook page so watch the page to see if anyone responds.
as a teacher, i do run into this issue with new students (or people who are curious but afraid to try). i tell them that yoga helps develop flexibility over time, and that it’s different for everyone. the main thing is that you show up and honor your body where it is right now.
i end my classes with “honor yourself for having come here today” because it *is* a big deal. when we do yoga — no matter what form, or how often, or how “well” we think we do it — we are dedicating ourselves to being deeply present with ourselves in that moment, just as we are.
for many of us, the level of acceptance required is difficult. that’s the real ‘challenge’ of yoga — can i accept who and what i am right now, without striving to be something else or shaming myself for being who and what i am?
i was speaking to a new student of mine last night. she says she loves yoga, but it’s so different than anything else she’s ever done. she’s “scared” before coming to class. she’s not sure what’s going to happen that day, what will be easy, what will be difficult, what’s going to “come up” for her. it is scary, and so, at the end of class, she does acknowledge the effort that she put forth in coming — in facing her fear and facing herself in those moments.
she said to me, “you know, yoga is really a mental game, isn’t it? yes, it has physical benefits, but really, it’s about the mind — how we talk about ourselves in our head, the stories we tell ourselves about who we are. when you’re in the pose, or in meditation, you just are. and you’re either going to fight that or accept it. i’m learning to accept it.”
Thanks Jenifer for your post, I love what you said about turning up to yoga: “we are dedicating ourselves to being deeply present with ourselves in that moment, just as we are”. Yes I can see it as a journey into self acceptance, which perhaps explains why striving for the body I want could never sustain my motivation to turn up. I love what your student said; “yoga is really a mental game isn’t it… how we talk to ourselves in our head” So true, so true. Thanks for sharing. xx
A quote from Sw. Satyananda Saraswati that I just read that seems to fit with this discussion:
Namaste P
Beautiful!!! xx
wow, what a great article, so much to it, loved, “Finding adjustments to suit my body became my thing. Feeling light and buoyant became the ‘stretch’.”
you’re the kind of person i want in my class 😉 i myself am not in the flexible half of the spectrum, though i’m working my way to my own mid point
i think, i’ll try, by way of my own example, to say how i handle the “flexiy” question in class, please bear in mind, this is very much “in progress” 😉
i hear “i’m not flexible enough” all the time!
my yoga classes are super beginner classes, for both the students and myself 😉
the answers i give are :
1) no matter your range of motion / flexibility, doing it to “your” capacity will do you the same amt of good as someone else who, with greater range, goes to “their” capacity
then i show them this :
2) a) i turn so my back faces the person or group, and reach to touch my hands behind my back, right hand over my shoulder first, with left hand reaching up
b) i say, “i have mild scoliosis” or “this is where i reach”
c) i repeat the reach reversing hands, left hand over shoulder, with right hand reaching up
d) i ask if they notice any difference (i’m cheating of course, since i know there’s about a 6 inch gap differenc)
e) i ask, should i break my shoulder or wrist to reach as far as my other side? nooooo 😉
f) is it worth my holding the pose on each side, or should i just do the good one?
i point out that i still get joint compression on each side (which is like comparing oneself to another person), each joint gets synovial fluid, bone growth potential; each side’s muscles get stretched and strengthened, and much more
from there, it’s individuated class discussion / doing, depending on who’s in class that day
obviously, we are all mostly asymmetrical, so it’s not hard finding a disparity, then demo-ing, then asking something similar
i’m sure there’s a school of yoga and individuals doing something like this, i’m just so new to the teaching angle, i’m just not currently aware of it, but this has just worked for me
be interesting to hear the other various replies to this, i almost always learn something new that way
thanks so much alys
ps – glad you opted for the more “safe” route 😉
wow Adan, that’s such a wonderful response … to offer your own body as a demonstration is the most inclusive response I’ve heard to that question. I think it’s great when a teacher can illustrate compassion through their own experience, and the nature of asymmetrical bodies, as you say, is a very accessible way of illustrating how silly it is to neglect one side of the body simply because it is stiffer than the other side. Brilliant! 🙂 Your classes sound very caring and safe. Thanks for sharing! xx
Hi Alys,
Your article definitely brings more faith & beilef in your practice & your self! I practiced Yoga extensively & everyday while I lived in India …was very flexible & soft at that time. 30 years after I decided to come back to it. Then last year I decided to go through a teacher training that would further help me understand & teach.. I am a montessori teacher & have been teaching Yoga to my students & saw the benefits of the practice for them & myself. The teacher training kicked my butt & I fought & worked even harder to be at the same level as the rest of the class. ( of course at my age & weight it did not happen) My mentor could have streamlined the regime that would have eased & fit my body into a practice that would have transitioned for me. So I was then determined to find myself for myself & did a lot of my own research & rescue. Needless to say I am more grounded & certainly more flexible.
My journey continues & I look fwd to teaching yoga for what yoga shld bring to the atman
Shanti Kalpana .
I love it that I can respond to this 1 year after it was posted. 🙂 Thank you for sharing your yoga through inflexibility journey. I find myself in a lot of what you wrote, and in a lot of the comments as well! I was a competitive swimmer throughout my youth and developed a strong but very stiff body. I have struggled in yoga classes when modifications were not offered and when the teacher’s example is something that I can clearly not emulate. I also came to yoga for meditation purposes (also a Vipassana course student)- and have also found that to accomodate for my own limitations at the moment I have to be a doubly serious student of yoga (and do my homework of what will work for my body at this moment and go from there.) Thank you for your words!
This really hit home for me. I’ve done meditation for years (though I can’t sit cross legged for any period of time), and I’m fairly physically fit from running but have never had “the body” for yoga. I’m tall (5’11” and 160lbs) and I have always had an “I wish I could do that” relationship with yoga. I’ve done taoist tai chi but that is more about meditation through movement and requires little flexibility. Yin yoga was highly recommended to me by my massage therapist, so I ordered the beginners DVD, only to find that I couldn’t even get into a lot of the gentle poses, never mind hold them for the recommended four to five minutes – in the DVD they all look like they could fall asleep in these positions and I end up in actual pain trying to get remotely close… so I haven’t exactly become a practitioner of yin yoga. I recently found an easy going general yoga class that I attend semi-regularly (though it is difficult with my work schedule), and it is the kind of group where I actually leave feeling good about myself and my body. I am going to keep trying to find a DVD type home practice I can do on my own time that works with my stiff joints and tight muscles. Just reading about someone else’s journey overcoming these challenges is inspiring my search to find regular yoga practice.
Hey Natalie,
Oh I remember those days so well!
Yin Yoga may be slow and deep, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t require a certain amount of openness to get into… I started with Iyengar and found this really helpful because Iyengar yogis at so proficient at using props and finding correct alignment. My teachers were excellent and really helped me find a safe way into the poses… even if I was propped up on three blankets just to sit cross-legged!
You may also find Melissa’s MYOGA Basics Series a great place to start – check out the page about it, and you’ll see where you can download a short extract of the audio and a PDF of the postures. Just like it suggests, Melissa focuses on the basics of practice and how to find your way in while keeping yourself safe and with correct alignment.
Good luck – and don’t give up! You’ll never regret getting stuck into yoga – think where you could be in ten years time. Easily sitting cross-legged!
Many blessings,
KL
Natalie ~
You and I are exactly the same height/weight. I look at these tiny, gymnastically-built models in magazines and know your frustration.
I am a yoga instructor but find many tricky-looking poses elude me. When something starts to hurt, I’m done. As a runner, you know the feeling of challenging-discomfort vs injury-pain. Yoga should be the same. If you’re not breathing easily, it’s not yoga anymore. It’s performance.
Videos move too fast and don’t cue enough information. I started with videos and found yoga either too easy (what’s the point here?) or maddeningly impossible.
A book that turned me around was “Moving Toward Balance” by Rodney Yee. There are 3 versions of every pose. He shows you what it should look like and has a descriptive paragraph that –best of all!– tells you what do extend/flex/lift/lower.
I did these poses after running and weight lifting and felt so much better after my workouts.
After trying more conventional yoga styles, and getting discouraged every time because I was lacking the flexibility and strength to do even the most basic poses and flows, I found my way to kundalini yoga though Ravi and Anas videos.
Now that style is something completely different. It is more focused on getting the energy flowing in your body with breath and movement and not so much about poses. This was the perfect gateway for me. It was easy enough to dive right in to but it still made me feel good. After doing some basic workouts for a while I found some more challenging ones that took me to another level. I really love kundalini yoga but I never got that strength and flexibility up to a place that I wanted it to be in.
So I tried that route again but was instantly discouraged. It was either too hard to follow or the poses were just to challenging for me.
Some things happen in my life that made me depressed and I stopped exercising all together. After almost a year my body was so stiff and tight that it was painful just to do every day stuff. I needed a change. And I stumbled over The Ulitmate Yogi with Travis Eliot and I was hooked from day one.
Yes, this was really challenging for someone in my position, but for some reason, the way the program is laid out it kept me motivated to keep trying and being consistent in my practice. Even though I could not finish some of the classes for the first weeks I kept at it each and every day, noticing tremendous results in a short period of time. I think this is much thanks to the variety in the program.
I’m so thankful that I found that set. It has allowed me to become flexible and strong enough to enjoy practice yoga. Now I love it and look forward to it every day.
I’m still no-where near as flexible or strong as I would like to be, but I’m getting there and I’m now having fun along the way.
Hey Henrik,
Thanks for sharing your experience – it’s great to hear about how other people find there way into yoga despite feeling really inflexible. Kundalini Yoga can be a really good way to start because of it’s focus on breath, movement and energy.
It’s always great too, finding a yoga DVD that works for you. Thanks for taking the time to comment.
I am the most stiff (inflexible) person that I know and I’ve just started hot yoga. After my first class I was more sore and stiff than I’ve ever been and I’m an occasional runner. I love the classes because of the focus and calm it brings to my thoughts. And the stretch burns and I know it only be good for me. I’ve become very interested in yoga lifestyle now and been looking at some hard poses. I wonder if I’ll ever be able to do them. I can but try.
I’m naturally super inflexible. Always was, even as a child.
I learned yoga when I was about 20, from an excellent book by Richard Hittleman (28 day yoga excersice plan) that I think is from the 70s. It starts very low level and points out that even if you can’t even get near what’s depicted THAT’S FINE! And just like it promises, little by little you DO get there, if you just do it at yr own pace.
I did yoga this way for about 1 hr a day for 8 months and I got pretty flexible! Though it was really the feeling after the very first day’s exercises that made me stick with it, because I felt a calm I’d only ever felt from taking Valium before, and wanting that feeling again kept me going.
Then life circumstances changed and I fell off the yoga wagon for quite some time. Amazingly I still kept some of my new flexibility that I’d never previously had, so it is DEFINITELY possible to become more supple even if you’ve got the flexibility of a picket fence when you start! You might never be a contortionist but it’s pretty cool when you with straight legs can put the palms of yr hands on the floor when you couldn’t even touch it with yr fingertips before you started!
Some time later I wanted to get back into yoga and decided I knew enough and was PROBABLY flexible enough to dare to do a beginners class. WRONG!
I’ve done yoga twice in a class (different places and teachers) and felt like an idiot both times despite it supposedly being “beginners class” & definitely NEVER want to do it again in a class!
I searched google today because I figure there MUST be others like me out there and who wants “ultrasuperbeginner” classes so you don’t get discouraged on the first try. The people that need movement most are quite probably the ones that never get it because they feel to embarrassed to continue when “beginners” is too hard.
My question to you Alys is:
How did you find yr playful/toddling class? (Word of mouth/internet search/local ad?)
Who was the teacher?
Do you know of anyone else doing similar classes (anywhere in the world)?
Thank you!
Nim
Can I start practicing yoga at home through videos ?
Yes, you can! Yoga videos can be a great way to get started.
At some point, you’ll probably find working with an in-person yoga teacher very helpful as they can give you personalized advice and assistance. But if that’s not an option for you right now, practicing yoga home with a video is a fantastic beginning.
There are plenty of people who are too inflexible for yoga. I’m one of them. I can’t sit cross legged. Can’t get into downward dog or any of the poses they said were “so easy a fat old woman with a cane could easily do it”. If there are modified versions, none of the teachers I’ve had are aware of them. They lead the class with the same sets, and if you can’t do them – well you just sit there. For the entire session. When I’ve asked what I could do to get to the point where I can do the “easy” ones, I’ve had verbatim the same exact replies “Go look on YouTube”. Guess what inflexible suggestions are on Youtube? Downward dog, cross legged stretches and several others that neither I, nor any of my friends can do.
Yoga is designed to be for upper middle class white thin women, and it’s gatekept *strongly*. Even to the point where every online resource starts out at a level that 90% of the American public would never be able to do it. That’s on purpose.
Sarene , so very sad to read your expression of pain.
I hear you.
I’m 65 this year and stiff as a board! I practiced yoga in my teens, Richard Hittleman, and became fairly flexible.
I recently tried to re-start my yoga practice and got nothing but pain! It hurts to sit cross legged, it hurts to do forward bends, I can’t lie flat on my back, although I did like with a pillow under my neck 10 minutes everyday for about 6 weeks! I almost scream in pain when trying to sit upright after laying like that for 10 minutes.
Everyday for 6 weeks is more than giving yoga a fair shot. So, I tried Tai Chi, but don’t care for the too-numerous small, precise movements. However, Chi Gong seems to be working for me. It’s repetitive but entirely standing, I stretch till I feel the pain then back off a bit. I sit on my heels, do Cobras just so I have some floor work in my routine.
So if you’r’e too stiff for yoga, try Chi Gong
Thanks Alys, for this honest exploration.
I’ve always loved the quote you share here:
‘Its not about touching your toes, but about what you learn about yourself on the way down’.
I hope lots of people discover that yoga is for absolutely everyone regardless of flexibility, strength, size, etc..