Kundalini Awakening
By Kara-Leah Grant, author Forty Days of Yoga
It can be scary, disorientating, dislocating and downright awful when Kundalini awakens.
Sometimes a Kundalini Awakening will look like mental illness, physical illness or emotional difficulties.
It can be difficult to figure out exactly what’s going on, all you know is something freaky is happening.
My own awakening began in 2000 and proceeded more or less unnoticed by me, except for strange jerkings of the body and poppings in the spine.
A dangerous mix of emotional avoidance and LSD tipped the process over the edge into a full-blown psychotic episode.
At the time, committed to the Lions Gate Hospital Acute Pysch Ward in Vancouver, I knew that what I’d experienced wasn’t just mental illness. I knew it was something spiritual.
I also knew that if I attempted to explain this to the doctors… well… they’d think I was crazy! Which, apparently, I was. So I kept my mouth shut, and did what I had to do to prove my sanity and get released from the hospital.
If you have had an awakening, I hope it wasn’t as dramatic and awful as this.
However, as one yoga teacher once told me, psych units are full of people who’ve had spiritual experiences (often mixed with drugs) that have blown their circuits.
So if you suspect something is going on, here’s what I would suggest you do, in order of importance:
1. Seek professional help
Really important! Find someone who knows about Kundalini, preferably local, who can be a guide and hand-to-hold through this process. If you’re in a big city, there’s likely to be a yoga teacher, meditation teacher, psychotherapist or otherwise knowledgable person you can turn to for assistance.
If you’re in a small town or rural area… it’s going to be much harder to find help. Think outside the box. In religious terms, a kundalini awakening is a dark night of the soul, and there’s many written accounts of various mystics experiencing this process. The right minister, rabbi, or priest may be able to assist.
Many native cultures also have their own understandings of this type of experience, often referring to it as a shaman’s calling, or shaman’s illness. So don’t get stuck on thinking you need to turn to the yoga world. In my experience, other yoga teachers are the least likely to know anything about Kundalini.
Find someone who understands that it is a core part of the human experience to go through a spiritual awakening that often involves a purification process of body, mind and soul.
2. Attend to any physical, mental or emotional needs with professional help
You may be all blissed out and on cloud nine, but you need to make sure you look after your physical body, your mental well-being, and your emotional state. Get the right kind of help.
If you’ve got any kind of physical symptoms, find a knowledgable, compassionate doctor with understanding of the mind/body field and get the right tests and procedures done. If you’re having issues with mental stability, find a good therapist or psychiatrist or psycho-therapist etc. Sometimes drugs may be necessary to stablise you in the short-term. Don’t rule out anything just because it’s not all rainbows and light sabers.
I was prescribed Epilim, based an a diagnosis of bi-polar. I refused Lithium, the usual drug of choice for treating bi-polar because I knew it had serious side-affects, but I didn’t refuse medication because I knew my psyche had been blown to bits. I needed support to get the new wiring in place! I took it for about three months, and then with the full knowledge of my flatmates and Mum, began to half the dose weekly while monitoring my mental state. Six months later I was drug-free, and my mental state had stabilized.
It’s prudent to be this practical. Kundalini Awakenings often throw us totally into the La La Sphere, and keeping our feet on the ground as well as fronting up to the actuality of our physical, mental and emotional state is really important.
Fellow Kundalini Awakener poet Dorothy Walters says:
Try to locate a Transpersonal Therapist who knows what Kundalini is and understands spiritual transformation.
You are not just undergoing extreme adjustment of your nervous system and physiology, you are (whether you know it or not) experiencing a profound spiritual awakening, for you are getting in touch with Source at its deepest level–you are discovering that in a very literal sense you and It are one.
3. Get grounded, get well, get clear
A Kundalini Awakening is a spiritual process that impacts our physical body. We’re getting re-wired on a DNA level to handle higher levels of prana moving through our system. Handling those increased levels of prana means focusing on what you need to do to bring yourself into physical balance.
It means cutting out all intoxicants (although alcohol in small amounts seems to be ok). If you’re still using drugs of any kind, your number one priority needs to be STOP. You’re risking your mental sanity in a big way.
Pay attention to the food you’re eating. Cut out the processed foods. In my experience, eating meat can be a way to ground and come back to earth. This can be useful! Other grounding foods include root vegetables, or certain nuts like brasil nuts and almonds.
Exercise is great – especially walking outside in nature. Get to the beach, or the bush and move. This helps to harmonise you with a grounded, sane environment and gets rid of any excess energy in a really safe manner. Even something as simple as sitting on a big rock can do wonders for your sanity!
Anything that takes care of your physical body and makes you stronger and clearer is generally a YES.
4. Accept and embrace the process
This can often be the toughest thing to do. A Kundalini Awakening shatters the ego and can make it difficult, if not impossible to function in society – at least for a while. It’s not unusual to even have to stop working.
When I came back to New Zealand, my system was so sensitive to light, sound and other people’s emotions that I found it really hard to even go to the supermarket. The whole experience would just trip me out. Driving was freaky because there were so many lights on the roads – especially in Auckland! For me, it was like the perception filters that make it possible for us to function without being overwhelmed with stimuli had stopped working.
What was worse was that I couldn’t talk to anyone about what I was experiencing because people would have though I was crazy. If you’ve never experienced a dramatic shift in the nature of your perception of reality… it does sound crazy – especially coming from someone freshly released from a psych ward!
On top of this sensitivity, all the hidden parts of my ego had been thrown up for me to deal with. And because I didn’t know what was going on, I wasn’t able to accept or embrace the process. I didn’t know there was a process even happening! I thought I’d had an experience of enlightenment, and now it was gone and life was awful.
So. How to accept? I can’t tell you that. You’ll have to figure it out by yourself. Suffice to say that what we resist, presists. Once you’re on the path to awakening… there’s no turning back, nor getting off. So you might as well embrace and work with whatever arises.
5. Build a support crew of like-minded friends
It really helps if you can talk to other people about what’s going on. There are Kundalini Support groups on line, but having a real-life friend is good too. They don’t necessarily need to have experienced an awakening, just be able to empathise and understand what you’re going through.
It’s good too if they can call you on your bullshit and help keep you grounded in reality. I’ve found this kind of support in the yoga and meditation community, and am forever grateful to my friends who can see when I’m getting caught up in the ego, or identified with all the lights & whistles of Kundalini and gently remind me to come back to centre, that which is unchanging within.
6. Get a daily spiritual practice going
If you don’t already, start a daily practice. This is part of grounding yourself, and helping the excess energy to move.
However, meditation is often the one thing you don’t want to do when you’ve had an awakening as it can make things far too intense, and only unground you.
Better to choose a practice that brings you squarely into the body – like Yoga or Tai Chi. It doesn’t have to necessarily be overtly spiritual either – dancing, or playing music when done every day for a set time can work just as well. So too can journalling. This can help you work through all the shit coming up!
What’s important is that you are taking time each and every day to be truly with yourself – in mind, body and soul.
7. Study and learn about Kundalini – take everything with a grain of salt!
It’s easier and easier now to find information on Kundalini, and it can be reassuring to read accounts from other people who’ve gone through the same process. However, don’t believe everything you read! What’s true for one person, might not be true for you. Plus people can have all kinds of agendas when they write books or articles so be discerning always.
Reading widely can help you to understand the process though, and realise that it’s all normal with Kundalini, and nothing’s normal with Kundalini.
One book I’ve really enjoyed is Kundalini Rising: Exploring the Energy of Awakening. A collection of essays by some very experienced and learned people.
Contributors include:
- Gurmukh Kaur Khalsa (The Eight Human Talents; Collins Living, 2001) on kundalini as the most powerful form of yoga.
- Ken Wilber (A Brief History of Everything; Shambhala, 2007) on the true nature of the chakras and how kundalini yoga seeks to “untie” them.
- John White (What Is Enlightenment?; Paragon House, 1995) on the challenges modern psychology faces in the context of the kundalini experience.
8. Watch out for grandiose thoughts and ideas
Sure, something pretty magical has happened to you, and you may even have had a taste of enlightenment… but you’re not special.
Oh no, this kind of experience is available to everybody. You are not the chosen one, you are not the next Buddha, although you may be on your way to becoming a buddha. That is, a person who is awake!
By all accounts, it seems too that the number of people experiencing Kundalini is on the rise. It is just part of the human experience of evolution.
9. Recognise that there is a process of purification in place and whatever you’re currently experiencing will pass
All awakenings are different, and progress at different paces, with different symptoms. If you’re hating it, it will pass, if you’re blissed out, it will pass.
I suspect mine got a turbo-charge through my drug use, and I was damn fortunate that the circuits in my brain didn’t totally blow out. It did take me seven years though to return to a place of equilibrium and general awesomeness. I had some serious shadow-work that needed to be done… and at times, this work threatened to overwhelm me. However, I always took comfort from the fact that every single day was always a tiny bit better than the last. I could see a change happening.
So, when your experience is totally sucking, just keep looking after yourself, seeking help and being supported and know that this too will pass. And if you accept and embrace the process, while studying up on what’s going on, you can likely make it a much smoother passage.
10. Surrender
In the end, that’s what an awakening is all about.
The Divine inside wakes up and says, right, time to come to life. And what the Divine wants to do may be different from what your ego/mind wants to do.
You can fight it as much as you like.
You can resist as much as you like.
You can go after the things in life which you want even though you know that’s not what your heart & intuition is telling you to do…
And you will suffer. How much depends on the how big a fight you put up.
In my experience, a small, quiet part of us always knows what we need to do. Kundalini is asking us to listen to that small quiet part of us until it becomes the only part of us we ever hear.
One last thing… there’s all kind of products and programmes scattered around the internet promising to awaken your Kundalini.
Before you spend money on such a thing, ask yourself if you’re truly ready to face the darkest, most awful parts of who you are. Ask yourself if you’re willing to surrender your life to the Divine. Ask yourself if you’re willing to experience all kinds of weird wonderful and not so wonderful physical, mental and emotional symptoms and signs.
Ask yourself if you really want to do the work that’s required when Kundalini awakens.
And if you’ve still got a burning desire to do whatever it takes to awaken Kundalini, good luck to you. May that desire be heartfelt and true.
Further reading:
- A full blown Kundalini Awakening
- Signs & Symptoms of a Kundalini Awakening
- A story of Awakening
- Another story of Awakening
About Kara-Leah Grant
Hi Kara-Leah,
thanks for sharing your amazing story! Sorry to hear that you had such a scary experience, or perhaps what you were experiencing was so misinterpreted by the health system. I had been studying meditation for over 20 years now and practicing yoga for at least 2 years. During this time i have also been a seeker, and read many different traditional spiritual text, as well as alternative new age philosophies. The common thread for me has been that ego seems to be an illusion. But as you say if you awaken to this fully, it can be very difficult to function in society.
I am a great traveller and what strikes me as profound is how important your “identity” seems to be to function in a material society – everywhere we go, we need to state our name, and label ourselves in so many ways, what we do for a living, what degrees we have, who we are married to etc. However there is little focus on how we live this present moment, which seems to be the way of a spiritual existence.
I meet many people who if they were really able to share their inner beliefs about the world would be at risk of being committed to psychiatric institutions which is very sad. I am not saying that all psychiatric services are flawed as they do deliver support to some people who need it -however the way that we look at what is sane and what is insane is very much based on our cultural perspective. Perhaps if there was much greater culture of spirituality certain events, such as the experience you were having, may have been looked at quite differently. Knee jerk medication, which used to be much more commonplace and is still common in some systems, can be unhelpful and detrimental rather than helpful.
What is heartening is that there seems to be a global awakening to the fact that the true nature of things are not what they seem, as you mention in your article. This is clear to me and all who are spiritually inclined. I recently moved to Sydney after 10 years, and pleasantly astounded by how much Yoga and massage and meditation seems to be offered to the society. It is a clear sign that people are willing to explore beyond rigidly held post industrial, material based ways of life. Also with the advent of internet and You Tube and such modalities, the information within can easily be dispersed allowing a better access for spiritually inclined beings.
Anyway i just want to thank you for your post and share some of my views. One last question – have you read any books by “Gopi Krishna” – he is the author who first introduced me to the concept of Kundalini.
Kind regards
Bishan
Hey Bishan,
Lovely to hear from you. And yes, I have read some of Gopi Krishna. He’s interviewed in that book I mentioned, and it makes for fascinating reading, especially as it’s years after his initial experiences so he’s had so much time to integrate and understand spiritual awakening.
The times are a’changin’ for sure… and it feels like sharing insights between each other as we all navigate this shift to a deeper understanding of life will only help make the process smoother.
I do think it’s important to remember that our identities or the ego aren’t necessarily an illusion – they exist alright. It’s just our complete absorption in these identities that we need to address. We need to wake up and realise that we’re playing a part – like actors on a stage. Once we have that awareness of playing a role, we can choose which role to play in which circumstance depending on what’s appropriate.
We are all everything – every personality trait, every aspect of being human. None is better than the other. The garbage collector and the CEO are the same, just fulfilling different roles.
Many blessings,
KL
Hi Kara-Leah,
thanks for your feedback and comments.
I agree with you that a life of identity and ego are real enough factors that we have to contend with and perhaps and perhaps describing the ego as an illusion wasn’t that helpful. Thanks for pointing this out.
I guess from my perspective, I feel the balance between identity and no identity is in favor of too much focus on identity (which can be driving by ego).
As I’m sure you and many others who are contributing to this amazing post appreciate, the topic is hard to describe in mental concepts.
I have always struggled to fully understanding the concept of “not self”, known as “anatta” in Buddhist philosophy, perhaps because it cannot be understood in mental concepts but rather experienced directly. I feel this is what a Kundalini experience is, without having had one myself.
This is why i like reading about your experiences and the experiences of others. It sounds like being freed of the chains of identity momentarily, and it also sounds quite peaceful.
One book that I read recently written by an author who described a life changing experience that could be akin to a kundalini awakening is called “How long is the Now? A guide to Enlightenment ..and beyond” by Tim Freke who is a “stand up Philospher”.
I really enjoyed the book, and also enjoyed reading how Tim handing his own struggle with the reality of a feeling of deep love and oneness, but the equally real feeling of having an identity. He talks about both states being of even value and moving between the two frequently.
Have you read his work?
http://www.timothyfreke.com/now.php
There is a video clip of him talking about his experience on the above link. I just thought you and others might find it interesting so I shared it (Nb I found the book to be better than the video clip makes out!)
Blessing to you also!
Bishan
Hey Bishan,
Great comment… loving this discussion. I’ve got lots I’d like to explore around identity/no-identity but I might save it for another article.
I hadn’t heard of Tim Freke, but really enjoyed the link you sent through. Ended up watching a few of his clips. Great stuff, thank you!
Blessings,
KL
an impressive list of suggestions!
glad you have #’s 1 & 2, getting help, first, followed closed with # 3, getting grounded
though i’m not sure about where i myself would fit in all this, these seem like reasonable well thought out guidelines
and as you say in # 8,
“this kind of experience is available to everybody. You are not the chosen one, you are not the next Buddha, although you may be on your way to becoming a buddha. That is, a person who is awake!”
so there’s not speciality in terms of being “better” than others, the specialness is the natural order of being alive i believe, and living that process
thank you kara-leah, glad you followed up with this info as indicated in some of your more recent posts, such as the one in elephant journal, “gettng out of my mind: drugs, yoga, meditation & me”
http://www.elephantjournal.com/2011/04/getting-out-of-my-mind—drugs-yoga-meditation-and-me/
nice photo-type graphic too btw
thanks again
Hey Adan,
There will be more follow up too… this themes just keep coming up at the moment, so looking at exploring them further.
Many blessings,
KL
Hello Kara-Leah
Thank you once again for sharing your experience, and can I say your tips and advice are great. Unfortunately after my experience I did take up marijuana again, which I now know was a huge no-no (though luckily the only drug I touched, even so, too much). And a year later I did crash spectacularly. Like you, I knew what I experienced was not mental illness. I mean, I had never been hospitalised before, had a career, had a fiancee, had a mortgage.
Awakening removed all that and took me into a bliss that was beyond everything I had ever known. All I knew, and do still, is that there is so much more to life, and I want to live it deeply and with integrity. I couldn’t justify working a job that wasn’t me, or being with someone I didn’t truly love. Because for the first time in my life I experienced love, and realised how blessed I was to feel this. It may sound cheesy, but it is so true.
The hard part is nicely put in the buddhist saying “before enlightenment, chop wood, make fire; after enlightenmentt, chop wood, make fire”; coming back to “reality” was so difficult and I was so close to not making it. I completely relate to you about bright lights and noise. I recall once sitting in my therapist’s room practically in tears saying “what’s wrong with me, I can’t go to the supermarket or the mall anymore”. Luckily, he understood completely and answered “that’s ok, neither do I”.
To sum up the outcome of this experience for me, it’s like a light bulb went on, and I asked myself “what is my purpose here on earth”. Because all I had been doing up until that point was utterly meaningless. I believe there is no higher blessing than to awaken to one’s own purpose, whatever that may be.
Sorry for such a long post!
Many blessings,
Monica
Hey Monica,
It is so wonderful to hear about other people’s experiences – thank you! I feel like you’ve added so much to this article just by taking the time to comment.
Many blessings,
KL
Hi there, reading this I was wondering if I had written it myself but had completely forgotten about it. Just amazing to read this really and as I am finding after a very long (and still continuing) dark night that I am not the only one and I am not simply going completely mental.
Thanks for writing this, I appreciate it
Graham
Hey Graham,
No you’re not the only one, and you’re not going completely mental. Spiritual awakening comes in many different forms, and affects all of us differently. Glad you found your way to this article.
Many blessings,
KL
Hi Kara-Leah
Thanks for this article. I have just experienced a kundalini awakening and nearly drove myself to hospital to be knocked out. I prayed and was told to let go and breath, which just about saved me. I have two toddlers and going through this intense anxiety whilst trying to look after them put me right into the centre of the storm – which luckily I came through. I know feel like I swapped my body with a light hallow body- and am just ok but can’t talk to anyone yet. But what now? Its like unless i go with the wave that carries me through the day I’ll get really very disorientated – to the point of insanity. So it does seem that letting go is the key and I feel like there’s just no turning back now – which my ego is just getting used to. I loved your article because everything I have just been through was expressed. You really can’t explain it unless you have been through it. Mine was like 24 hours on top spin in the wahing machine. I think I have also unlocked past life karma – which I’m trying to also now process. I’m a bit scared to meditate further because of how open and vast I feel – it’s like what will happen if I go even deeper into it – will i be able to function? It really sounds great in theory but when you are in the eye of the storm there can be nothing more destabilising. This happened to me because I have listened with honesty to my inner guides and have been on a sincere search for truth – I really don’t know where my life goes from here, but this is profound. Good to know Im not alone
Hey Katie,
Good to hear from you. As for what now? I would suggest that you find a yoga teacher with enough experience and wisdom to guide you through this experience. Generally a swami of the Satyananda tradition who has studied for 2 or more decades is a good place to start.
I’d also suggest not meditating at all right now. Sometimes it’s better to focus on grounding practices like cooking, cleaning, gardening. Just being here now. You need to let everything stablise and your nervous system catch up to what’s going on.
It is a day by day process, being able to meet your own needs, so you can meet the needs of those around you – like your children.
Hi Kara
Stumbled across this whilst searching for answers to what happened to me 7 months ago whilst doing a Vipassana course. I’d like to share my experience and see if you guys think it sounds like the same thing.
It seems I probably had a Kundalini awakening on the 3rd day of the course. I went very deep
and my body started to shake, then a silver crown appeared above my head, started spinning and then there was an eruption, or more like being hit by lightning, of pure white light shooting up and down my being from the top of the head to the base of my body. Very powerful. The closest thing I can relate it to was a very intense psychedelic experience. But even that seems like a weak comparison. This happened several times on the same evening. After that sleep was almost impossible for the remainder of the course. Meditation always deep after that with visions, suppressed feelings surfacing etc. My body also started doing things by itself when I got home and continued the meditation. Shaking, extreme twitching whilst meditating which then turned into what felt like being manipulated by an invisible hand into strange positions.
I’ve continued my meditation daily ever since and seem to be getting drawn more and more into meditation and contemplating more on ideals of self realisation etc.
In recent weeks I came across a book that talked about Kundalini. before then I new nothing of it and had no idea what was happening to me. Intuitively I felt it was spiritual, but there’s always that latent fear that somethings gone a bit astray with the brain and nervous system.
After speaking to the Vipassana teacher recently, he put my mind a rest about the body jerks, visions etc. I’ve moved beyond them now and back to more peaceful meditations. Nothing unusual is happening now. Maybe the odd flash of a vision whilst meditating, but thats about it.
Does this sound like a kundalini awakening to you, and what happens now? Has it gone dormant
or disappeared with the subsidence of side effects.
Apart from all that I feel relatively the same but with the addition of a very strong interest in meditation, and some heightened awareness of energy in myself and others.
Thans in advance for any comments
Guy.
Hey Guy,
Since writing this article, I’ve moved away from labeling these experiences as a “kundalini awakening”. It can be useful to have a handle to call something, but it can also be confusing, and put an experience inside a box. What you’re experiencing sounds like it could be a natural part of the awakening process. As we awaken, our minds and bodies slowly purify themselves – hence the shaking etc at times.
So I can’t tell you what happened to you exactly, or what will happen next. I would encourage you to find friends and teachers who are also meditating and practicing yoga, so you’ve got access to shared wisdom, and a good support network of people who understand the awakening process. Be mindful of spinning “stories” about your experience, and instead just experience the experiences, letting them go as they subside.
Many blessings,
KL
Hi Guy,
I’d like to respond to your post, since some of your comments reminded me of some of my own experiences…
Yes, it sounds like you did experience the kundalini. The acceleration of energy is what can sometimes make it burst through the body. I have had several ‘bolts of lightening’, as I call them, the last one being very powerful and preceded also by a feeling of a vortex of energy accelerating. When the bolt struck, it went from the base of my spine, up through the top of my head, but I don’t really think the direction matters. In my case, the light was so bright it was actually visible to someone who had his back to me, about 20 feet in front of me. I had no idea of what I had experienced, other than it was interesting…:) When I discovered “by chance” that it was identical to Gopi Krishna’s experience, my ego started to make a bigger deal out of it. Soooo, it can be helpful to identify the experience, but as Kara-Leah already said, it can be confusing…I would say it can also take your ego off track, so watch out!
I try to think of it as just another interesting experience in the dream, and it’s fun to learn to control this dream too…But one must always try to remember that it is just a dream. Being mentally disciplined is, I think, a big asset on the spiritual path.
The effects of kundalini may be very subtle with you, ( they have been with me) and unfold slowly. (Apparently I got it easy, with almost no “bad stuff”.) It is definitely different for everyone. Best not to get too caught up in it though…As tempting as it may be, you will be better off not thinking at all!!
All best wishes to you.
Namaste,
Jeannette
Hi Jeannette
Thanks for the interested reply. I’m now at that place of not thinking at all about the experience I had, and I’m remaining equanimous regarding the jolts and contortions that now come with the meditation.
I’ve spoke to a few experts from different backgrounds. Everything has lead me to just trusting myself and what I’m feeling. I don’t know for sure exactly whats happening or happened and have decided to not label it Kundalini or otherwise, although I do know it’s a healing transformation and the only thing I can be sure of is my direct experiences and what I intuit from that.
So I’m happy to say I’ve quickly moved on from the ego getting too attached, which was the pull I was definitely feeling the first couple of months. Reading up on it just made me think too hard and begin to long for certain things.
I’m lucky enough to have been working daily with Vipassana meditation which I find an excellent
practice for maintaing equanimity and just being a silent observer of the body and mind.
I’ve also started yoga, which has helped turn down the volume of the side effects.
I’d recommend it as a grounding tool if anything else.
Good luck with your journey on the way up 8)
peace and love
Guy
Hi Kara-Leah,
This is such a great article- I haven’t read a whole lot on this subject, but the way you write is mesmerizing and if everyone wrote so well I would end up reading more!
It sounds like my experiences have been quite different from yours, but I can relate to some of what you write…especially the shopping malls! (still find them too draining…yikes!) Some of my physical symptoms over the years include the skin on my hands and feet peeling off, my left big toenail turning blue (after 20 years it has lightened a bit, but still is slightly blue). If I go into a state of non-thinking, my eyes roll into the back of my head, my breathing might go into spontaneous deep, rapid exhalations, my body might jump up and down, or shudder, and a smile automatically comes, (just like what I saw on statues in India, many years later). I can’t handle the level of energy that wants to come in when I do this…if I could let it enter fully, I know it would shatter me for good…not ready for that yet!
My intuition developed to the point that I often know things before they happen and have regular “psychic” experiences. In general, this is a help, but also the sensitivity that comes with this needs a new mental framework, or I end up not ever wanting to encounter random people at all. I have found that deepening compassion has been the best tool in dealing with info picked up…but it’s still a challenge for me.
Anyway, lots of interesting experiences…it’s fun and I enjoy reading about your thoughts and insights.
You are wonderful!
Thanks,
Jeannette
Hey Jeannette,
Awesome to hear both of your experiences, and your grounded way to perceiving them. Really liked your response to Guy, most helpful! I have to ask – are you a Kiwi? And do you practice yoga/meditation – ie. did you have some kind of framework for what was going on when it happened?
Blessings,
Kara-Leah
Hi Kara-Leah,
I live in the US.
Well, I wasn’t sure I knew what a kiwi was…vague memory of knowing, so I had to look it up online…does that answer it?
Yes, I did have a pretty good framework in place- from a young age I had developed an elaborate system of self mind control and I was used to bizarre experiences. Later on, I discovered that my “system” was actually called yoga, so I felt like I had sort of found home. I have gone through periods of practicing regular meditation (which for me is just sitting w/out thoughts), but if I intensify it by doing it for long periods, then I get a little scared off. Facing Mother Nature can be so humbling…and terrifying to realize how small (and powerless!) we really are!
I would say that a person trying to awaken the kundalini without proper preparation is like a person trying to cross Cape Horn in a dinghy. If one is able to stop the thoughts for any length of time, I believe it will rise on its own…
Best wishes,
Jeannette
Hey Jeantte,
Ah… thanks for the extra detail. I love how you say meditation is just “sitting w/o thoughts”… as if that were such a natural and easy thing to do… but I also know what you mean.
Hi Kara-Leah,
I again I want to thank you for this article (which i have been following for over a year now) because the discussion and dialogue it has created is very rich. I also enjoyed reading about Guy and Jeanette’s experiences (along with all the other comments) – for they have helped me gain a deeper understanding.
I have come to realise through my scientific research that much of the problems that I tend to have in understanding concepts are to do with the language and symbols used to transmit ideas. This highlights the wisdom of philosophy that suggests direct experience is the best way to know something, for when we describe something it can easily be distorted. For example labeling unusual experiences as “Kundalini” creates a binary concept (ie Yes or No) from what I believe is perhaps a spectrum of experiences. It think you mentioned this in your own reflections – is that correct?
To me it kind of like parallels when friends ask me – “does meditation work?” – to which I reply “what do you mean work?” . I don’t think meditation has an inherent purpose (unless you want it to that is), but it’s a tool for observation. In the same way perhaps the kundalini experience is what it is to the person experiencing it at the time they are experiencing it – just a thought – I wonder what others think. I certainly haven’t had any of the profound experiences that others have mentioned but I do feel that there are moments of awakening. Perhaps even contributing in this forum is a like a little “wake up” nudge. (here’s a nice poem on meditation http://bishansworld.posterous.com/meditation)
Also, I totally agree with the comments on being weary of how the ego reacts to moments of awakening because it may try and “own” or “Identify” with moment rather than just accepting it for what it was.
Just a few random thoughts (which may or may not be of help?)
thanks for the platform to discuss – would love to hear your thoughts/reflections
Cheers
Bishan
Ps I have recently read a book by Don Miguel Ruiz (who wrote “The Four agreements” ) called “the Fifth Agreement” and it expounds the concepts in this post far more eloquently than I have just done – in my opinion it is worth a read!
Hi Bishan
After reading your post I think you’d resonate with a book called ‘Self Observation’ by a guy called
Red Hawk. Your language and philosophy is linked.
Cheers
Hey Bishan,
Yep, I reckon you’re bang on. The way that we describe an experience immediately turns it into a this or a that… and language can then hide what it truly is, or make it seem like it’s something else.
And yes, it’s been fabulous to see new people discover this article and leave comments over the last year or so. It’s created a beautiful sense of community. Love the web for that!
Blessings,
KL
Hi guys
Throwing this out there for technical support.
I’ve now developed facial contortions whilst I meditate (on top of other movements), they’re quiet extreme at times and also a constant buzzing in my head much like tinnitus – this is constant noise at the moment.
Does anyone have any knowledge regarding tinnitus as a side effect?
Hey Guy,
Love your terminology…. don’t get the tinnitus. But yes, get some pretty weird facial contortions at times, which usually lead to some kind of click or pop… a release. Maybe a bubble of samskara as such…
I’m sure I’ve read about tinnitus being a common side effect too. Not sure if this will help, but I downloaded this excellent book from Sounds True, containing essays from many scholars, scientists etc (most of whom have had personal experience with Kundalini). Find it here: http://www.soundstrue.com/shop/Kundalini-Rising/2002.productdetails
Hi Kara
Ok thanks I’ll check that book out. I had tried another book which didn’t really do it for me ‘the Kundalini experience’. Just when I was starting to forget about Kundalini. Seems it commands attention. Yeah the facial thing is weird, but getting used to weird now. The Tinnitus is more a annoyance which I’m having to work with for now. One other interesting thing ‘I’ve noticed once or twice recently is a sweet perfume smell whilst meditating.
What a strange journey this is turning out to be. To think I only started meditation to help clear my mind, and now all this.
Thanks for the advice
With metta
Guy
Hey Guy,
Have heard of the sweet perfume too… It’s amazing sometimes how common these experiences can be!
I have had a very similar experience to yourself..I am trying to find out how to process shadow. The Split off consciousness. I have read so many different ways of going about it, from acting it out which some people say only reinforces it, to just sitting with it..which seems like would take many life times to process. Do you have any suggestions how to actually process very intense shadow material, not just the run of the mill anger, irritation etc.
Thanks for your article.
Hi Matanich,
It’s difficult to know what you mean by ‘intense shadow material’, and my suggestion would be to find an excellent therapist to work with – preferably someone who meditates or practices yoga as well. Beyond that, I’m not sure I can offer anything else of value.
Blessings,
KL
Thank you for your response. I was resonating with your comment in the body of your article about working with shadow material and how overwhelming it was for you. I have looked at lots of resources about how to work with shadow material and am surprised that people talk about the need to work with it but don’t offer much as to how to do that particularly in a situation with a compromised psyche, ego. I am working with a therapist who is quite good. I just look to real life experiences and processes from people’s success with working with difficult areas of the psyche.
Thanks again for the article. I am glad to see that you have made it through your tough time.
Ah… I see the line you meant. I’m not sure how to describe working with the shadow aspects of Self, beyond being able to stay centred and observe their arising with non-judgment. That alone takes practice and skill! Mostly, I practiced yoga, I practiced meditation, I chanted, I did pranayama, and I looked to find the center so I could observe and inquire to everything else that arose. My practice was key, absolutely key.
Thank you for that. That is sound advice. That center is kind of hard to find when you have had a psyche shift isn’t it LOL. I really love hearing stories about people that have hit a similar place as myself and have made it through to brighter pastures…! Thanks
I need kundalini friends…. i’m only 20 years old with a kundalini awakening, but I know a lot about chi energy, grounding, here and there of kundalini..
EMAIL ME
Hey John,
I would suggest finding an on-line group or forum based around Spiritual Emergence, like this one:
http://www.meetup.com/Spiritual-Emergence-Group/
Groups such as that can often be very supportive and you can meet people who’ve had similar experiences to you. As with any online group, be discerning in which one you join.
Good luck,
KL